You might be rich. You may be good looking. But your chances with women go down to zero if you can’t start a conversation with a girl.
She won’t approach you. Sorry, but you can count on that – it’s pretty much a given that an attractive girl can walk into a bar and she knows she’s gonna get laid. And men? Well, even the best-looking guys know they have competition.
It’s up to YOU to start a conversation with a girl, be it in a bar, on the street, at school or wherever you fancy. If you don’t, you can expect to be unapologetically weeded out of the gene pool.
Granted, that’s a little heavy for today’s topic. But it illustrates that it’s up to you to make the first move – something you may have more success with if you use Nexus Pheromones attraction scent.
To start a conversation with a girl, you can use prepared conversation starters or use something situational.
A Cold Approach
Let’s not beat around the bush here. You’re looking to score, agreed? Then you likely need to meet more women. So we’re going to talk about how to start a conversation with a girl anywhere, any time. That’s day or night, in your neighbourhood or across the globe. While customs may change, the basics are the same.
Also, here’s something else to consider. We’re talking about ‘cold approaches’. By definition, that’s a woman you don’t know. She’s not interested in you – yet. Hence, she’s ‘cold’, as opposed to a girl you already know. But don’t worry. We’re going to give you the tools to change that in this article.
Where to Meet Women
To start a conversation with a girl, you have to be in a place where you’re going to encounter women. Shocker, but it’s true. You’ve got to be in the game to play it. Fortunately for you, there are women everywhere – yes, everywhere. You don’t even have to set foot in a bar to meet them.
Some of the best places to meet women, and hone your conversation skills with them, include:
Happy Hour – Happy Hour works. It’s that simple – women are off work and want to unwind with their friends with a few martinis. Find a Happy Hour near you if you’re single, and use it to exercise your all-mighty conversation skills with women.
On An Intramural Sports Team – Women like sports too (GASP!). In fact, some women join sports leagues just to meet eligible guys.
The Grocery Store – Yup, this works too. You can start a conversation with a girl in a grocery store. You’ll want to be a little strategic how you do it. We’ll get to that.
At a Concert – Concerts aren’t ideal for conversation because of the obvious – it’s loud. That said, they’re a great place to meet women because you have a shared interest in the artist or genre. Hit her up before or after the show, or in the beer line.
The Dog Park – This may be one of the best places to start a conversation with a girl, assuming you have a pooch of your own.
An Athletic Event – We’ve already established that many women like sports. Baseball games are perfect for this, because there’s more time to chat, as opposed to, say, the end-to-end action of a hockey game.
Trivia Night – These are PERFECT for chatting with women. Find a trivia night at a bar near where you live. Go with some guys and play against a group of women. Have fun with it.
Coffee Shop – There’s a reason so many guys use coffee shops to meet women. Avoid girl wearing earphones or typing furiously on a laptop. But if she doesn’t look preoccupied, you’re free to chat her up.
The Gym – The gym can be a difficult place to start a conversation with a girl because many women are self-conscious while they’re working out. They’re there to get in shape, not to speak with guys. Having said that, you might think about joining a gym class. Chat a cutie up before or after the session and you’ll have plenty to talk about.
Public Transportation – This can also be a challenge. However, you can start a conversation with a girl you like while you’re waiting, and continue it on the bus/train/choose your transport if things are going well. Watch for signs of disinterest, though, and leave her alone if it’s clear she doesn’t want to chat.
To approach a woman in a grocery store, you might want to wait until she’s in the check out line.
To meet women, open your eyes and see them, everywhere you go.
6 Steps to Start (and Keep) a Conversation With a Girl
OK, so you want to start a conversation with a girl. You know it’s your responsibility to do it, and have an idea where you can practice your chit chat and meet girls in the process. So how do you start a conversation with a girl you don’t know? Start by doing this:
See Women EVERYWHERE
There are roughly 3.5 BILLION women on the planet. We’ve already talked about where you can meet many of them. So open your eyes and increase your awareness of them.
Pay attention to your surroundings. A man of high value walks slowly, with his back straight, and takes the time to absorb his surroundings. If you’re in a bar or club, hang in the higher traffic spots where you can see plenty of people (without staring), like the edge of the bar or dance floor.
Be aware of girls off to your side. You’re welcome to turn and start a conversation with them if someone catches your eye.
Embrace Your Fear
Let’s be honest. It can be intimidating to start a conversation with a girl you don’t know. But then again, if you’re trying to meet women, you get what you put into it. If you never approach women, you’ll never get women. So rather than avoiding fear, embrace it. When you feel anxiety creeping up, tell yourself “I’m nervous right now because I’m about to talk to a hot girl and it’s normal to feel that way. So let’s do this!”
To use an often-used adage, “Everything you want is on the other side of fear.” So if you’re feeling nervous, that’s good.
The longer you wait, the harder it gets to approach that girl you’ve been scoping. Famed pick up artist Mystery (of Neil Strauss fame), has long advocated the ‘3 Second Rule’. That means approach her within three seconds or you’re likely to flake out.
Of course, excuses why you shouldn’t approach may creep up (“she’s probably got a boyfriend”, “She’s not my type…”). Those are excuses, agreed? So instead of giving yourself the time to talk yourself out of it, walk in her direction the moment you see her. If you panic, relax. See step one – embrace it.
Have Some Canned Openers
If you want to start a conversation with a girl, you need to have something to say. Contrary to what you might be dreaming for, there is no one line that will magically give you the keys to your heart. It’s more about how you say your opener and, just as important, her reaction to it that really matters.
With that in mind, it’s good to have some prepared openers you can blurt out automatically. They’re like training wheels. You’ll take them off eventually, but you’ve got them in your back pocket for now to get things going.
Openers a huge topic on their own and worth a separate article. But here are the basics you need to know:
Direct Approach: When you convey your interest immediately. You could walk up to a girl, for example, and say something like “Excuse me, I know this is random, but I have to say I saw you just now and thought you looked really nice”.
This takes a lot of courage. But the payoff can be huge because women respect that kind of bravery – plus you’d be making her day. Direct approaches are a good way to start a conversation with a girl you’re interested in during the day.
Indirect Approach: This can be anything non-sexual and/or that does not convey your interest in her right away. Hence, it’s indirect. While it takes longer to get a phone number this way, it’s easier on your nerves. Something like “How’s it going” is as basic and you’ll get. But – say it right it and you’ve got something to work with.
Google “Indirect approach openers” for examples to think about.
Situational Approach: This is when you start a conversation with a girt based on something in the environment. For example, if you’re both staring at a street performer posing as a statue, you could say something like “I always confuse these guys with real statues. My friends give me grief for it.”
Push Through the Awkward
So you’ve started the conversation. That’s a great first step. What next? Well, you need to continue the conversation if you want her phone number – which is what you’re aiming for if she’s piqued your interest. The awkward part comes next, after you’ve delivered your opener and, of course, you have to keep things going.
You’re nervous. She’s nervous. But you need to push through it.
Here’s something to think about. The moment you feel nervous, aim to keep the conversation going at least 10 more seconds. This is for several reasons. First, the longer you chat, the less awkward it should be. Second, if you don’t push through it, you don’t get her number.
And third, much of the awkward is probably in your head.
Push through the awkward. The next step can help you do just that.
Keep it Going
There are many ways you can continue a conversation with a girl you’ve just approached. One method to think about is to visualize a pot between you and her.
Yes, a pot.
Everything she says goes into the pot. You can then use it go keep the conversation going. For example:
Make a Statement – Like “You look like you’re a graphic designer, and you’re coming back from a power lunch with a client who works on Wall Street.” Don’t worry if you’re far off om this. In fact, the further off – and cheekier your statement – the better. It puts plenty in that conversation pot for you to work with.
Ask an Open-Ended Question – Like ‘Why did you choose to become a lawyer? Avoid questions that can be answered with a ‘Yes’ or ‘No’.
Get Her Opinion – Something like “What do you think of the nightlife in this city?”
Assume She’s Attracted
It’s easy to let negative chatter fill your head before an approach. And indeed, there are times (like in niteclubs with plenty of high status women) when you’ll be held to a higher standard than you would in, say, a coffee shop. But don’t assume she’s not interested. Instead, look for ‘Indicators of Interest’ – signs she’s into you, like playing with her hair or standing close to you.
Also, at some point, stop the conversation. Does she try to keep it going? That’s another good sign.
When you assume women are attracted to you, you’ll play the part, and give off the vibe that you’re the prize. Because you are the prize – so act like it. And it all begins with a conversation.
Guy talking to girl in a cafe.
How Nexus Pheromones Helps With Attraction
Nexus Pheromones is an attraction fragrance. It’s a fragrance of 7 pheromones linked to ‘tall, dark and handsome’ that bypass the rational part of the female brain and go directly to her mating centre.
Pheromones are chemical secretions that organisms give off to announce their presence. Mating pheromones are especially powerful – like Nexus Pheromones – which tell her subconscious mind that you’re an alpha male.
They won’t seal the deal on their own. But they’re a confidence booster when you go in to start a conversation with a girl and an edge you’d love to have.
She’s more likely to be receptive your conversation with Nexus Pheromones and the advances that follow. So experiment, and think about adding Nexus Pheromones to your attraction tool kit.
Now you know how to do it. Get out there and start a conversation with a girl. Push yourself, and with a little luck, a phone number and something better may follow!
Nexus Pheromones is an attraction cologne that can give you an edge when talking to women.