It takes a lot of effort to make any relationship work, and this is especially true about marriage. Since men and women are the polar opposites of each other, staying together requires cooperation, patience and understanding.
While you may know hundreds of ways on how to make love to your wife, do you really know how to show your love for her? Women crave intimacy in a relationship. They see the marital relationship as a partnership. Although sex is a big part of it, they also need to know you love them, and most women crave romance, too.
It’s hard to unravel how a woman’s mind works, so men could use some pointers on how to have a happy marriage. Juggling the demands of your job, family, personal, social and other responsibilities can take so much of your time and take its toll on your relationship. Learning how to love your wife the way she wants you is one way to make your bond stronger.
What Women Really Want: The Secret to Keeping Your Wife Happy
One of the biggest secrets about women is that they aren’t as complex as men think. In fact, the only thing they want could be summed up in one word – love. In fact, the bible says the same thing in Ephesians with this command: “Husbands, love your wives.”
This need for love can get confusing as women see love in different terms that men do. While men are straightforward, women require a more subtle approach. Wives, in particular, need to feel appreciation and affection from their husbands.
Providing for the family and giving her a sense of security are definitely important, but women need more than that. To get help you get started on your quest to show your wife you love her, we have rounded up some tips.
Skin to Skin Contact: Give Her a Relaxing Rubdown
After a long day, most woman want nothing more than to collapse in the closest bed and get some shuteye. But if you are offering a free massage, she would love you more for it.
Remember that this type of massage should be relaxing not just a quick rubdown. If you feel extra generous, before you invite her for a massage, pour her a bath. Be sure to add essential oils, some of the best choices include rose, sandalwood and ylang-ylang.
Be sure to start the massage at your wife’s foot not her back. Make your way up to her calf, leg and back. Keep the progress slow and apply just enough pressure to ease her tense muscles.
She would certainly appreciate your efforts and you might even be surprised how thankful she could be.
Send Cute Texts: Make Your Wife’s Day with One SMS
We send tons of text messages in a day but sometimes we forget to send one to our loved one to show affection. Send your wife a text just to tell her she’s beautiful, to share an inside joke or to express how much you are looking forward to going home to her.
This small gesture will make her feel that despite your hectic schedule, she is still your top priority. If you are trying to rack up good points, a quick text is one of your best options.
Be a Responsible Adult: Pick Up After Yourself
In most household settings today, both partners are working. This means that your wife has so much on her plate, not just her job but also keeping the home together and taking care of the kids. Given this workload, you can give her a hand by doing your part.
She will appreciate seeing you do simple chores like putting dirty clothes in the hamper and taking the trash out voluntarily. You can also take the notch higher by offering to give the kids a bath, tutor them with schoolwork and help her tuck them to bed.
Despite how independent and strong a woman is, she cannot do everything. You need to pull your weight in the relationship by doing some chores. By being your wife’s partner in every way, she’ll know that you have her back.
Show Gratitude: Express How Much You Appreciate Everything She Does for You
Women remain to be mainly responsible for the home no matter how modern our society is. Members of the fairer sex get drilled on the doctrine on how to love your husband according to the bible at an early age. Women are expected to take care of the children, do household chores and serve her husband’s needs.
Despite society’s expectations, your wife has every right not to take over the household. Yet, she voluntarily took over these responsibilities out of love and the desire to take care of you and the family. The least that you can do is to thank her.
Women may have the “mom reflex” to smooth over everything by instinct, but your gratitude will be music to her ears. It’s not necessary for your thank you need to be grand. Just knowing you appreciate what she does for you will make her feel that despite her shortcomings she is still doing something right.
Schedule Couple Time: Take Her Out on a Hot Date
Even if you are already married, it is vital to dedicate some nights to going out as a couple. Grabbing a quick bite together does not count. Relive those moments when you and your wife were still dating and set some time aside just for the two of you.
When you are married, you get too used to the humdrum of daily life. The kids need attention, there are bills to pay, and a million other things could make you strangers with your wife, even if you sleep in one bed. Having all these distractions out a few nights a month can do wonders for your marriage.
Taking her out on a date makes her feel that you want the world to see you together. Plus, dates give her an excuse to pamper herself not to mention she would be doing all this to be beautiful for you.
Listen: Give Her Your Full and Undivided Attention
Women like to talk all day. Given how wives can go on and on about something, their husbands learn to tune them out. While no one can blame husbands for doing that, there are times when your wife wants you to pay attention to her.
When she is talking about important stuff, give her your full attention. Turn off the gaming console, stop tinkering with your phone, put the TV on mute and listen to what she has to say. Given everything she has to put up with, the last thing in her mind is to compete with anything for your attention.
Women feel neglected if you can’t do something as simple as listen. This has been one of the classic reasons why couples get into a fight. Your wife would feel that you are there for her if she has your undivided attention.
Women need to feel valued. Caring enough to sit through her random ranting is a good way to show that you are taking her troubles seriously.
Hugs and Kisses: Make Her Feel Special with Intimate Gestures
Are you interested in learning how to love your wife better without saying the words? Giving her a hug is one simple answer to do that.
If you are not a hugger, it is high time to consider all the benefits of this loving gesture. Aside from being one way of showing your love to your wife without saying so, it can be an instant mood booster. Hugging your wife also makes her feel more secure and it reduces loneliness, anger and isolation.
There’s also proof that hugging can keep people healthy as it stimulates white blood production. Plus, you can keep your stress and blood pressure level low by giving your wife a hug. But out of all the reasons why a hug is a great idea, this one’s the best – it leads to kisses and more.
Kisses happen to be the ultimate gesture of love, but kissing should be done not just as a prelude to sex. Kissing should be done for the sake of kissing.
Kisses have a lot of benefits and it definitely helps relationships grow stronger. In one research, Professor Kory Floyd’s team at the Arizona State University found out that relationship satisfaction increased as the number of kisses increased during a six-week period.
Giving your wife more hugs and kisses is a great way to cement your marriage. With all these benefits and the promise of more intimate moments, you have every reason to kiss her.
Plan a Surprise: Do Something Special Just for Her
Women love surprises! In fact, women love planning surprises for their husbands in the hopes that their man could get the clue.
By planning a surprise for your wife, you make her feel that you value her. Throwing a surprise, even a simple one, takes some effort and the fact that you spent time on that for her is commendable.
For married couples, things become too comfortable that husbands don’t realize that they forget to do something special for their wife. Going out of your way to get her a gift or prepare a surprise would make her feel valued. Even simple things like writing a note helps, because when it comes to love letters your wife would appreciate knowing you care.
Provide Pampering Services: Volunteer to Brush Her Hair
Most women have an affinity for salons. Most women know how to do their nails, apply many hair products, and even dye their hair. Yet, beauty bars remain to be a big hit. This is because women love when someone is pampering them.
Did you know that you can deliver the kind of pampering those salons provide? You can do this by doing something as simple as brushing her hair.
Remember that you should not brush her hair in the same haphazard way that you brush your own. The last thing you want to do is pull her hair which is not romantic at all.
When brushing her hair, don’t start at the roots, start at the edges to untangle knots. If a knot is stubborn, untie it by running the brush several times. Once you are done with the edges, you can start brushing from the scalp down to the tips.
You want to take your time when doing this and you can also throw in a free scalp massage. A 15 to 20 minute brushing session would be ideal. Your wife might suspect that you have an ulterior motive but nonetheless having someone else brush her hair would be very relaxing for her.
Just Smile: Let Her Know How Lucky You Feel to Have Her
Smiling is one way you show the world that you are happy about something. If you want to let your wife know you feel so lucky to have her, smile at her.
When your wife is constantly smiling, you feel like you are the best husband in the word. She would feel the same way when you smile at her.
Smiling is contagious and smiling at each other is one great way to kick off each morning. Aside from an affirmation of how lucky you are to have her, smiling is also a great mood enhancer. Some experts say that a smile stimulates the brain the same way that 2,000 chocolate bars could.
Show Respect: Value Her Individuality
Your wife is different in her own right, and that makes her unique. As much as possible don’t rub her shortcomings in her face, and don’t compare her to your mother or to someone else’s wife.
You may not know it, but your wife already feels stressed out enough about doing more than your mother does for you. Constantly criticizing everything she does by pointing out how someone else does this or that would end up in hurt feelings, and it could only land you on the couch.
As much as possible avoid comparative language, voice what you want without bruising her pride. Another thing that you can do is point out the unique things that you like about her whether it’s the way she bakes cookies, folds clothes or sets the table.
Show her and tell her that you love how different she is from everyone else.
Avoid Temptation: Be Careful with Female Friendships
You may be the alpha in the relationship but females are territorial in their own right. Your wife knows that she is not the prettiest girl on the planet but she wants you to see only her.
Unless a female is really old or extremely young, your wife sees every woman surrounding you as possible competition. Your wife may have full faith in you and you should live up to that. Tread carefully when other females are involved, especially in the workplace.
Even if your wife trusts you, she doesn’t trust the women surrounding you. If she suspects that you have a thing for anyone else, she could get into jealous fits. At first, this jealousy may seem cute but it could be a prelude to a full-blown fight and drive a wedge between the two of you.
Rather than bask in the female attention, try to be more careful. If you value your wife, you need to set boundaries between you and other women. Otherwise, this issue will come up, again and again.
Practice Good Hygiene: Keep Yourself Looking and Smelling Good
Apparently, most guys stop paying attention to hygiene once they get married. Prior to tying the knot, men tend to be very meticulous about the way they present themselves to their partner.
Even if you are already with the woman of your dreams, you still need to make an effort to practice good hygiene.
Simple things like taking a shower, shaving and wearing deodorant could instantly make you more attractive. While it is true that you could mask the scent of natural pheromones when you take a bath and apply hygiene products, you would look more appealing to your wife. If you are worried about losing your charisma, products containing these chemical messengers such as Nexus Pheromone are already available in the market.
By practicing good hygiene, you are not only doing yourself a big favor, you will also be more desirable to your wife. This is certainly a win-win situation for you. Plus, you can definitely count on spending more time with your wife.
Cherish Her Children: Invest Quality Time with Your Kids
Your wife loves your children unconditionally. The bond between a mother and a child is so strong and you can’t fault her for always looking after the kids. If anyone, even you, makes her children feel inferior and unloved, she will take action.
If you are constantly neglecting your children, no amount of counseling and self-help on the topic on how to love your husband would make her love you again.
Taking the time to teach your son to ride a bike, attending a recital, and just spending time as a family would do great things for your marriage. By showing love and kindness to the children, it would be as if you are expressing your affection for her.
Affirmation and Affection: You Can Love Your Wife Again
While it may be true that action speaks louder than words, your wife wants to hear you say you love her once in a while. Telling her how you feel is an affirmation for her.
We all have bad days, misunderstandings and tough times, but it is important to know how to love your wife when she hates you, or at least when it feels that way. Say “I love you.” In fact, these words may even be the best thing she could hear from you.
Many relationships fail because of the lack of communication. Unless you make your wife know that you need her not just to cook and clean but because you love her, she would feel like she’s your personal servant.
Expressing your love for her is just a start, tell her why you love her and how much. Don’t be afraid to tell the kids how lucky you are to have her as your wife. A small effort to express your love for her without hesitation makes her feel more secure in your love.
How to Love Your Wife and Make Your Marriage Work
Most of us know this ancient marriage advice, “Happy wife, happy life.” Although it requires two people to make a marriage work, keeping your wife happy is a great start.
In any marriage, the wife needs to feel loved. If your wife feels that she is isolated and alone, she will start distancing herself emotionally and physically from the relationship. In fact, of all divorce petitions about 60 percent are filed by the wife.
Given these facts, you need to be a better husband to her. Learning how to love your wife the way she is expecting you to would be wise. While there is no perfect relationship and there is and will always be trials, but you can rest assured that your wife will love you if she knows you love her.
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